Clamming Up

I have an overwhelming desire to speak into situations. I think part of it’s just the way I was built. However, I think the main driver comes from seeing and experiencing God’s truth applied to life and seeing the success it’s produced.

And then there’s the competing driver; I don’t want to be wrong, be in opposition with someone else and/or come across as argumentative. So, most of the time, I get a good dose of analysis paralysis and freeze. That’s raw but I strive toward authenticity and I’m not sure I could be any more honest.

And then I read this in my morning devotion and I found out my experience in this situation isn’t unique to me.

“When they deliver you over, do not be anxious how you are to speak or what you are to say, for what you are to say will be given to you in that hour.” Matthew‬ ‭10:19‬ ‭ESV‬‬

The context of the passage is about Jesus sending out the disciples and this is one of the instructions. He expected them to be anxious when trying to figure out what and how to communicate their message. He assured them they’d just know when the time came. I’ve actually had that experience in other public speaking situations and have to imagine it would even easier with the assistance of the Holy Spirit.

He also instructed that their reaction to the truth isn’t my responsibility. That’s hard for a people pleaser. We don’t much like folks to be unhappy with us. But I suppose it’s like offering a drowning man a length of barbed wire. It may not be a comfortable solution but it’s the only one and then it becomes their decision to choose between perpetual pain and a temporal one that leads to life.

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